Top 20 Zlatan Ibrahimovic quotes

The Telegraph have done a top 20 list of quotes from Swedish football star Zlatan Ibrahimovic. “Ibra” is not only controversial on the field, but outside it as well. This week he got a red card in the Champions League round of 16 when PSG secured a spot in the quarter-final, playing 2-2 against Chelsea at Stamford Bridge. In his home country, Zlatan is considered to be the nr 1 star. Although he has won many of Europe’s domestic leagues, he hasn’t won the Champions League or any World Cup/UEFA championship with Sweden. Anyways, here we go, the Telegraph’s Zlatan top 20:

20: If Rooney still wants to move next summer, I would urge him to come and play with me in Paris. But he would have to get used to the fact that Zlatan scores even better goals than him.

…welcome to Paris!

19: Onyewu resembled a heavyweight boxer. He was nearly 6ft 5in and weighed over 15 stone, but he couldn’t handle me.

…now now, it’s football you’re playing, not martial arts.

18: I didn’t injure you on purpose, and you know that. If you accuse me again I’ll break both of your legs, and that time it will be on purpose.

…enough said!

17: Reporter: Who will win the World Cup play-off? Zlatan: Only God knows. Reporter: It’s kind of hard to ask him. Zlatan: Why? You’re looking at him now.

…great, now give us some predictions about the UEFA 2016 qualifiers.

16: One time I got dressed all in black, Rambo-style, and took a massive pair of bolt-cutters and nicked a military bike.

…at least it wasn’t a grand theft auto and a Porsche…

15: I can play in the 11 positions because a good player can play anywhere.

…keep working on those defensive skills!

14: Zlatan-style!

…50% Swedish, 50% Yugoslavian, 100% Zlatan!

13: I like fireworks too, but I set them off in gardens or kebab stands. I never set fire to my own house.

…good call!

12: Come over to my house baby, and bring your sister. I’ll show you who’s gay!

…now what would Helena say about that?

11: An injured Zlatan is a pretty serious thing for any team.

…stay healthy and avoid the red cards!

10. When you buy me, you are buying a Ferrari.

…not a Porsche or an airplane?

9: I don’t give a shit who wins. I’m going on holiday.

…when Sweden got eliminated in the EURO 2012.

8: First I went left, he did too. Then I went right, and he did too. Then I went left again and he went to buy a hotdog.

7: We’re looking for an apartment. If we don’t find anything, then I’ll probably just buy the hotel.

…looking for somewhere to live in Paris.

6: Nothing, she already has a Zlatan.

…when asked about what his wife Helena will get for her birthday.

5: What Carew does with a football, I can do with an orange.

…how about them apples, Carew?

4: One thing is for sure, a World Cup without me is nothing to watch.

…then try do like Ronaldo in the qualifiers between Portugal and Sweden – be the decisive force in the match!

3: I can’t help but laugh at how perfect I am.

…well, he does have humor…

2: Absolutely not. I have ordered a plane. It is much faster.

…denying rumors about having bought a Porsche.

1: Zlatan doesn’t do auditions.

…refusing to do a trial for Arsenal when playing for his Swedish club Malmö. Zlatan later played for Ajax instead.

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